


The Penny Plague of DOOM!

by AmusedError (Monoski1)



Category: Invader Zim
Genre: Alien Biology, Alien Sex, Alien Technology, Anal Sex, Antennae, Apocalypse, Bottom Dib (Invader Zim), Comedy, Doom, Drama, Drama & Romance, Dubious Consent, Dubious Morality, Extremely Dubious Consent, Gay, Gay Sex, Laboratories, M/M, Meme, Minor Character Death, One Shot, Plague, Sex, Short One Shot, Smut, Tentacle Sex, The Author Regrets Nothing, Top Zim (Invader Zim), Weirdness, Xeno, ZaDr, no beta we die like men, pennies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-03
Updated: 2020-01-03
Packaged: 2021-02-27 10:14:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,786
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22105378
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Monoski1/pseuds/AmusedError
Summary: What's the worst that could happen when Zim's plans to take over the Earth go awry? I mean he probably had a backup plan if something did go wrong...right?"Dib felt himself be unceremoniously flipped over. The smell of the bleached floor reminded him of how this all started. He certainly did not imagine his day turning out like this. At least, Zim was now unable to feel how hard he was getting. Wait, why was he hard?!"
Relationships: Dib/Zim (Invader Zim)
Comments: 12
Kudos: 136





	The Penny Plague of DOOM!

**Author's Note:**

> This takes place after the events of Into the Florpus.

It was cold and dark on the floor of Zim's laboratory. The stench of bleach strangled Dib's nose as his face was currently smooshed into the immaculate floor. He fought to intake oxygen as he clutched his surely bruised guts. Faintly heard was a shrill cackle, and perhaps even boasting could penetrate one's ears if they listened hard enough. Dib, however, at this point couldn't care less. His focus was solely on the strange contraption in front of him.

It shot through the roof of Zim's base like a skyscraper. It had a strange device in the middle almost- "-id you REALLY think you could stop me Dib-worm. You-" as if something was supposed to be placed there. A spotlight was placed on that one specific spot, so it had to be important… right? Then again, -" pathetic worm baby. As IF you could stop the ALMIGHTY ZIM," this wouldn't be the first time Zim had manipulated his thoughts as a means to gain the upper hand. 

"Are you even listening?!" Zim's screech pierced through the air upon realizing that he was being ignored.

Dib flinched on the cold unfeeling floor as he craned his neck to look up at Zim. The alien was looming above: perched delicately on his Pak's legs so as not to fall. In his right hand, something glimmered in the spotlight's harsh glow. 

"Now that I have your attention, Zim will now destroy your DISGUSTING planet this!" Zim shouted as he held up his hand even further for Dib to inspect. Dib frowned and scrunched his face up.  
  
"Is that a penny? Why-"

"Humans are so easily enamored with such stupid things so I have-"

"Is this because of the figures that are being released for **The Angry Monkey Show**?"

"I will not be questioned by the likes of you!" Zim said as he pointed directly at Dib. "Anyway, as I was SAYING, I have created this machine with the FINEST of Irken technology to completely render all of Urth's inhabitants completely useless as I take over this pitiful planet."

"But, why a penny?" Dib questioned.

"SILENCE!" 

Dib watched on in horror as Zim practically slammed the penny down under the spotlight. The penny began to vibrate with such an intensity that Dib felt adrenaline surge through him. He refused to let Zim win after the Florpus incident. Not again. 

"No!" Dib said as he forced his body forward. It was more of a lurch but, it got the job done. He pressed all his weight into Zim's Pak legs. The screech that was ripped from Zim's lips was as unholy as it was ear-piercing. The only thing that came close to matching its intensity was the sound of the window breaking behind him as he fell. Dib watched on in horror as Zim crashed into the pavement below with a loud crack. 

"Zim is going to kill me," Dib said as the horror dawned on him.

"I am going to KILL YOU when I get back up there!"

All the more reason to work fast then. On shaking knees, he turned to examine the machine. The sounds of a struggle could faintly be heard from below as he struggled to make sense of what he was seeing in front of him. The machinery made even less sense up close. Any removal of the dastardly penny was impossible now as it seemed to have been absorbed into the machine upon activation. Suddenly, Dib felt the vibrations that contraption was producing suddenly halt to a stop. 

Then, a reminder popped up into view on his phone. It was their yearly dinner outing. If he left now Gaz probably wouldn't kill him. But, _Zim_. A phantom of Gaz rang out in his head, _"Dib if you're late, I **will** kill you." _

No! He must stop Zim even if the world refuses to acknowledge that aliens exist! He just needed definite proof that's all. 

Suddenly, he felt something- no someone- grab him from behind. 

"Your late _Dib._ " 

"Gaz! Wait, Zim has done something horrible-"

"Your playdate with _Zim_ is over Dib-"

"Playdate!?"

They were already on Zim's front steps at this point. Dib struggled to get out of Gaz's iron grip as he watched on in horror as to what was happening around them. Somehow, half the town was ablaze- chaos reigned around the two. Faint screams of, "I need them…" were all Dib could make out.

"Gaz, can't you see what's happening around us!?" Dib's struggling only increased as he felt the hopelessness start to sink in. "We can eat dinner later, ok? You can even have the last slice of pizza this time!"

"Dad said he wouldn't give us any pennies if we didn't get to dinner on time. Sadly, that includes you too."

"Pennies?" Dib said as the color drained from his face.

"Yes, pennies," Gaz said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world, "And, I NEED them, Dib."

Dib saw that at the repeated use of the word, 'pennies', multiple heads swiveled in their direction as the chaos momentarily stopped. He watched in horror as people lifted their heads to sniff in their direction. The mob crept closer. Dib could make out the word being murmured repeatedly on their lips as they inched their way closer: pennies. 

"Gaz?" Dib said, truly starting to panic now.

"Out of the way!" Gaz shouted as she charged through the crowd. She knocked away any living thing that currently resided on her warpath.

Before long they made to their house: the only building that was somehow not in shambles or on fire yet. Gaz charged through the door eagerly. _The last time Gaz had been this eager was years ago when the Gameslave 2 was announced._ Then, Dib was unceremoniously dropped as Gaz caught a handful of pennies that were thrown at her. 

"Good job Gaz!" Membrane's voice echoed above Dib. Then he turned to face Dib with a serious expression painting his clouded features. "Dib come quickly!" Then he charged further into the house. The food prepared by Foodio that adorned the table was long forgotten.

"What is it, Dad? What's going on?" Bewilderment crept into Dib's voice.

Dib mentally and physically stumbled as he tried to keep up with his Father. All of this was happening too fast for his brain to properly process. _Just what had Zim done!? Knowing Zim, he probably didn't even know what he was getting himself into._

Dib forcefully shook himself out of his thoughts. His father had a strange sense that could tell when he was thinking of Zim, and Dib did NOT need him to call Zim his boyfriend right now. It wasn't even like that. 

_Sure, they hung out practically every day since the Florpus incident, but that was only because Zim's evil plans had drastically increased in frequency. Not that he could blame him. He probably would want to distract himself from the revelation that his entire mission was a farce and that he had most likely killed his Leaders if he was in Zim's shoes. But, it wasn't like he could talk to Zim either. God, Zim was so stubborn._

"Dib! Now is not the time to be thinking about your strange little boyfriend right now. They're going to break through the barricade!" Membrane said.

"He is _not_ my boyfriend! And what do you mean they're going to get in? And just who is trying to get in!?" 

The sounds of frantic scratching and banging became more apparent as Dib approached to where his Father had stopped in his haste. The garage door was taking a serious beating as the abusers didn't have any intention of stopping. It wasn't going last much longer at this point.

"There's no time to explain! Here take this," Membrane said and handed Dib a strange jar that was hidden under a blue cloth with the logo of his Father's company on it. It jingled faintly when it was moved so suddenly.

"I don't understand!" Dib said. Frustration was beginning flood outside of him in a rush of emotions. 

Then, with a mind-numbing crack, the garage finally succumbed to its abusers. It let out a final sigh as a mob of people streamed in. They came in droves wielding merciless intent. They screamed- oh, how they screamed.

"We SmElL PenNieS!" The amalgamation's crows swirled together into a cacophony of _need._

"RUN!" Dib's Father screamed as he was swallowed entirely by the mass.

"Dad, NO!" Dib screamed as he backed away in horror of the monstrosity that Zim had inadvertently created.

Dib didn't even realize that he had been running until he felt his legs give out from underneath him. Dib didn't even realize that he had been crying until he saw his tears hit the pavement below him. Dib didn't even realize how much he loved his father until he lost him. Dib didn't even realize that he had been carrying a jar of pennies close to his chest as if that would fill the void left by his father's absence. Dib didn't even realize how much he HATED pennies until he threw the jar into the street and watched them scatter like falling stars. Dib didn't even realize that he was now in front of Zim's base.

"ZIM! I am going to KILL YOU!" Dib screamed. He felt fury fill his bones. 

"THEN, I am going to _dissect you_!" He felt vengeance ripple throughout him. 

"AND THEN THE WORLD WILL SEE YOU FOR WHAT YOU REALLY ARE!!!" But mostly, he just felt betrayed. 

"AND THEN… and then, a-and th-then…" Dib felt himself crumple in Zim's makeshift attic lab.

_It just hurt so much. Why must it feel like his chest is being torn open? Why doesn't he want to destroy Zim- it was the one thing he was supposed to do!?_

***Crash!***

It was Zim… crawling through the window? Why? Couldn't he have just taken the front door?

"Ah! SNIVELING Dib-stink, I see that you are still here. Good. Now, I can _kill_ you for MAKING THE HUMAN RACE SMELL EVEN _WORSE_ THAN IT ALREADY DOES!" 

"What?" 

Dib's self-pity was replaced with concern as Zim stumbled into his dramatically placed spotlight. Zim somehow looked even worse than he did. Most noticeably, what remained of his disguise was in tatters. His tunic/dress-thing (?) had its pockets ripped out: presumably where Zim had stashed some pennies. From the dim light, Dib could see that Zim's antenna was trembling.

"My _genius invention_ had worked even on the likes of me, Dib-beast. NOW, all I can smell is the disgusting copper running through your kind's veins," Zim sneered.

"I don't think that's how that works-," Dib started. 

Dib forced himself to stand as Zim steadily approached- despite the condition that he was in. Dib readied himself for a fight as Zim grabbed him the collar of his trench coat. He watched as Zim's antenna moved forward. Abruptly and without warning, Zim pinned Dib to the ground.

"Hey!" Dib choked out.

"Quiet! THIS-," Zim gestured vaguely in Dib's general direction, "is _not_ allowed."

"What is _not allowed_ is forcing mankind to devolve into madness over pennies!"

"No! What is not allowe-"

"Huh!? What? What could be more not allowed than getting my Father killed?!"

"What? The Dib-father isn't dead. I just saw him fighting over a hoard of pennies," Zim said scrunching his face in confusion.

"Really?" Dib sighed in relief.

"Quiet." Zim snarled and slapped a hand over Dib's mouth. 

Zim's antenna was now roving over Dib before stopping and resting in Dib's hair. Zim took a deep breath and exhaled. Zim was _smelling_ him. Dib felt his face flush. 

"What is _not allowed_ is for you to smell so damn good," Zim finished through grit teeth.

_Wait, was Zim smelling his blood? He knew blood tasted like copper but… he didn't see how it could smell like pennies. More importantly, was Zim humping him?!_

"WHAT is _not allowed_ is for you to make Zim feel this way! I am an Irken invader a-and invaders do not n-not… Don't give me that look Dib-filth! This," Zim sneered before leaning in closer, "-is all your fault. It's only natural that you take responsibility."

Dib felt himself be unceremoniously flipped over. The smell of the bleached floor reminded him of how this all started. He certainly did not imagine his day turning out like this. At least, Zim was now unable to feel how hard he was getting. Wait, _why was he hard?!_

"Zim!?" Dib groaned. He felt something wet grind against his leg.

"What?" Zim moaned in the most exasperated way an alien of his caliber possibly can.

"Do you even know what you're doing?" Dib asked. He felt his pants be forcefully shoved down. As a result, he reached his hands back.

"Stop that!" Zim said before grabbing Dib's hands and restraining them above his head, "Of COURSE I know what I know what I'm doing." 

Before he knew it, Dib's underwear was shoved out of the way. He felt Zim pause. Out of curiosity and _only_ (yes only) curiosity Dib craned his neck for the second time that day to look behind him. Zim's face was scrunched together to create an unreadable expression. The only thing that gave the alien away was his antenna careening forward. Zim needed this as much as he did. 

_Wait no no no. He didn't need this- whatever this **even** was. _

Dib forced himself from spiraling further down into the endless mass that was his thoughts. Only to see that Zim's leggings were pulled down to his knees. Wait was that a tenta-

"Stop staring at me like that, Dib-stink!" Zim's face flushed before it changed into a sneer," I _knew_ you were crazy Dib, but not _this_ crazy."

Dib shivered as he felt Zim press against him. Whatever Zim had felt _wet_ and _wriggled_ as if it had a mind of its own. Did it have a mind of its own? He would have loved to find out under different circumstances. Dib imagined Zim under him and strapped to an autopsy table open and exposed. He brought back to earth at the fact his throbbed at such thoughts. He was better than this- right?

Dib felt himself lurch forward as something thin and slimy pushed inside of him slowly. He bit back a moan at the sudden intrusion. Zim's body pressed against him as he pushed his tentacle inside of Dib more and more. Dib noticed that Zim's antenna was roaming his hair freely at this point.

"Crazy? Says the one whose currently inside me. If anything, you're the crazy one!" Dib bit back. He was currently forcing himself not to press back onto Zim. 

"My tallest, do you ever shut up?" Zim said as he completely pressed himself inside with a moan. 

The sudden movement prevented Dib from silencing the wanton moan that spilled from him. Dib's cheeks burned with embarrassment. It wasn't _his_ fault Zim's tentacle only got thicker a-and longer the more Zim had pressed into him. And the damn thing hadn't stopped wriggling either. No, it seemed to be moving even more frantically. Dib felt himself clench in an attempt to stop whatever movement Zim's tentacle was trying to do. But, pleasure coursed through his veins. He was trembling at this point from forcing himself to not rock back on to Zim.

"There we go. That's much better Dib-thing." Zim said oozing with satisfaction, "Submit to Zim."

"Never."

"We will see about that, Dib-worm," Zim sneered into Dib's ear. Then he set a punishingly harsh pace: snapping his hips against Dib. 

It was all too much; Dib collapsed under Zim. The only thing keeping him connected to Zim was one of his hand clasped firmly around his wrists and the other firmly placed on his hip. Dib felt his body giving in as it started rocking back onto Zim. The wriggling of Zim's tentacle had only caused him to inadvertently and continually press into Dib's sweet spot. Not long after, he felt himself getting close.

"Zim… I'm gonna..." Dib said gasping for breath. 

He felt Zim's grip tighten before something oozed inside of him. It made his insides burn and tingle all at once. The sensation pushed him over the edge. He could feel his cum seep through his shirt. He sighed and rolled over to his side. Dib felt Zim wrap his arms around him and let out soft chirping noises. Exhaustion settled into Dib's bones.

"We really need to turn off that machine…" Dib said as he felt his eyes droop closed. Everything would return to normal after the machine was shut off… right?

**Author's Note:**

> This was not based on the I smell pennies meme. I don't know what you're talking about.


End file.
